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KAY DECUIR — Outsmart your bully, always hold your head high & stay strong

In my last article I wrote to inform you about Cyberbullying in various settings. This week I would like to shed some light on Workplace Bullying and Bullying in the Educational Setting.

Some examples one might experience in these types of Bullying are:

  • Constant ridicule, criticism in front of others and public humiliation.
  • Gossip, false tales, FAKE NEWS and spreading of rumors.
  • Aggressively picking on people for no particular reason except to try and embarrass them.
  • At times bullied people might find themselves being demoted to a lower position at work or assigned meaningless tasks.

The impact or abuse by bullies can be life-altering and make a huge impact on the way a person thinks or feels. It can cause depression, the desire to commit suicide, becoming involved with groups or gangs that are inappropriate just to have a sense of belonging.

Symptoms for children being bullied in school can last through adulthood. Most likely children of a young age do not tell adults that they are being bullied in any setting. Even adults in the work place do not report their situation to the human resource administrator.

Some reported and researched symptoms of children that parents or teachers can watch for are things such as not sleeping well, not wanting to play outside, not wanting to go to school or a social function, not performing well in school, not wanting to go to a public restroom, constant worry or anxiety, changes in behavior such as self-harming, (cuts to the physical body) lack of communication with others, no eye-to-eye contact and, for the very young, possibly bed wetting.

In the work environment, bullying can cause long term mental issues and other symptoms such as anxiety, high blood pressure, stomach ulcers, physical weight gain or loss, low self-esteem, lack of sleep at home, constant time off from work and self-harming characteristics.

Workplace bullying can cause such hardship issues it can cost a person the career he has worked so hard to achieve.

No matter who you are, your age or work position, if you are being impacted by bullies at any point in time, the best thing to do is tell someone you trust who has an authority position. Don’t be embarrassed or try to handle this issue on your own.

Remember last week as I shared, the bullies harassing a person is someone who was bullied before and they know the feelings you are experiencing. They are unhappy in their own life and just want to make someone else unhappy.

Don’t let them know they are getting to you. Don’t let them be the reason you stop trying to reach your goals in life. Don’t let them take charge of you. You are in control of your own behaviors.

If you need help ask. You will be surprised to find that many people in life have experienced being bullied at some point.

In the educational setting, schools by law are required to have policies in place on bullying. Most employers have “bullying in the workplace” in the employee handbook. Each will provide you with entities who can help with counseling, support groups and training on how to deal with bullies.

Don’t let the bullies know they have the upper hand because they will continue to harass you and make your anxiety grow. Once they truly know they cannot bother you, they will get bored and move on to someone else.

Refer to your school handbook or employee handbook for resources that are free for help with bullying.

I may not know you personally but if you are reading this article, I know you are stronger than you think you are. You can beat your bullies. Don’t lower yourself to the level of the bullies.

Hold your head high even on the lowest days and surround yourself with people who genuinely care about you. Your true friends in life know who you are they will not believe in FAKE NEWS.

If they choose to believe the bullies, the best thing you can do is walk away because they are not your friends! I wish you the best and know you can win against bullies. Take it from someone who has been bullied many times in life. When my bullies attack, I become a stronger person now that I know how to handle the issues.

Bullies will not rob me of my profession or knock me down. Bullies often find others to do the bullying for them. You know, you can outsmart a bully! Keep your faith!

Kay DeCuir is the executive director of the Nederland Economic Development Corporation. She can be reached at kdecuir@nededc.com.