Autism: ‘a battle worth fighting’

The Port Arthur News

September 05, 2008 10:41 pm

— By Amy Moore
The News staff writer
GROVES — Daniel Lindsey’s love of dinosaurs was something his mother thought was a normal boy’s childhood hobby.
Knowing the names of his favorite prehistoric beasts and the details of their existence was nothing out of the ordinary, thought Denise Lindsey.
When Daniel starting telling his mother about dinosaurs she’d never heard of, she was amazed.
And as a player on his little league baseball team, Daniel often pretended to be a dinosaur on the field instead of paying attention to the game.
Slowly, Lindsey realized that Daniel’s personality was different that other children his age. He had what she called, social issues, but after he was put on medication for ADHD, Denise said Daniel was a new child.
However, the problems continued. Daniel couldn’t sit still at school and always wanted to touch his classmates - to feel their hair - and he continued to act like a dinosaur. Lindsey said teachers thought the boy simply didn’t listen or was uncooperative.
After a trip to a specialist in Houston, Daniel was diagnosed with Autism at 7-years-old.
“For me it was a relief. I always knew there was something else,” she said. “It was a relief because I couldn’t figure out what it was.”
Daniel, now 13, is still fascinated with dinosaurs but is able to carry on conversations and function as a ‘normal’ child.
To help the family cope with the diagnosis, they are a part of the Autism Society of Southeast Texas.
Lindsey is the current president of the organization and said the support group is a place where parents can turn for information about behavior, diets, dealing with school or other issues related to raising an Autistic child.
The group meets the second Tuesday of the month and alternates meeting places between the Lamar Speech and Hearing center and First Baptist Church of Nederland.
With over 200 people on their mailing list and over 300 people on their email list, Lindsey said the group meetings are a place where parents learn information and share stories.
“Most new parents cry when they tell their stories. They are still emotional. They’re past the shock phase. I think they are in the acceptance phase,” Lindsey said. “ It’s normal to be scared when a child is diagnosed, but it’s not something to be scared of. You can die from polio, but you can’t die from Autism.”
For Lindsey, she said Daniel’s diagnosis put her son’s life in perspective for her.
“You think of the dreams you had for what your child could have been and realize that they may not come true,” she said.
Lindsey’s younger son, Bradley, 8, has not been diagnosed, but she said she does see signs that indicate he, too, is Autistic. She’s unsure, though, what could be symptoms of the disease and what are things he simply learned from his older brother.
“He could be diagnosed this year,” she said. “We tell people that once you meet a child with Autism, you’ve met one child with Autism. All children are different and the severity of the disease is different in them all.”
Tammy Marshall is the past president of the Autism Society of Southeast Texas. Her son, Grant, 9, was diagnosed as Autistic at 22 months old - two months after she began to see the signs.
“I noticed early that Grant wasn’t doing things Garrett (her older son) was doing,” Marshall said. “Grant had speech then lost it. That was a red flag.”
Marshall said she read an article in a newspaper that explained behaviors related to Autism.
“It was verbatim word for word what my son was exhibiting,” she said. “The doctor said to give it a couple of months but I’d rather look stupid with a ‘No, he’s fine’ than missing that critical time. I’m with him 24/7. I’m the mom, it was an instinct. The doctor couldn’t tell me no.”
Seven years later, Marshall said Grant is able to verbalize his wants and needs but is still “not a very good talker.”
She admits, though, that Grant would not be where he is today without his older brother, Garrett and little sister, Gracie.
“He wants to be like his older brother. When my daughter was born three years ago, she brought Grant out of his own little world,” she said. “He knew she would be everywhere and he had to start watching what he did. She’s attracted to him, she thinks he hung the moon for her.”
Through the Autism group, Marshall said she’s able to help other struggling mothers through their issues.
“I remember being that distraught mother. I had family members to lay my burdens on, but they didn’t really get it. It was good when I saw other people in my shoes. I don’t feel isolated anymore,” she said.
Marshall said all of her best friends, including Lindsey, are part of the Autism group - a place where members are more of a family.
“You can’t help but feel relieved. The moms with older kids helps the moms with younger kids. You talk about their milestones. It’s people you can turn to who get what you’re saying,” she said.
Children are welcome at the meetings and baby-sitting is provided by local school organizations.
“They are in a room with other children like them, but also with other kids who don’t have Autism. It’s a social experience that they can’t get anywhere else. They get the social interaction that they need,” Marshall said.
Both Marshall and Lindsey have different views on how children get Autism, whether it be genetic or the effect of exposure to metals in vaccinations. No definite cause is known.
Despite that, Marshall said she considers Grant’s diagnosis a blessing.
“Had it not been for Grant, I would walk through life looking at the big picture. Because of him, it’s a monumental moment for us when he hits a milestone - that’s what matters,” she said.
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